Judge: Why
don't you try going straight?
Defendant: It would be bad for my image. |
Judge: Why
have you added assault to robbery?
Defendant: It pays to diversify. |
Judge: Why
is it that you always go free?
Defendant: My lawyer is as big a crook as I am. |
Judge: Why
were there so many witnesses to your crime?
Criminal: I do my best work in front of an audience. |
Judge: Why
were you arrested for petty larceny?
Defendant: I've downsized from grand larceny. |
Judge: Why
were you breaking into the car?
Defendant: My family was inside. |
Judge: Why
were you carrying a concealed weapon?
Defendant: I didn't want anyone to steal it. |
Judge: Why
were you scalping those tickets?
Defendant: I couldn't sit in all of them. |
Judge: Why
won't you swear to tell the truth?
Defendant: I gave up swearing. |
Judge: Why
won't you take the oath?
Witness: I never swear in public. |
