I tripped up on a fur ball

My dog was surfing the net all night

I ate too much sugar

There is a lot of it about

I'm just goofy from watching too much TV

I'm having a bad hair life

I was too busy doing nothing

My waterbed made me seasick

There was a postal mix up and I got mailed to Rome

I got a wedgie

My dog was snoring half of last night

My clone did it

I was just following the instructions

My brain wasn't getting enough blood because my underwear is too tight

I had my contact lenses mixed up

I was in Peru at the time

That's a left brained task and I'm more of a right brained person

I don't think clearly before a meal

I don't think clearly when I'm awake

I'm right out of clean underwear

The gnomes did it

I was just alphabetising my underwear draw

You didn't say "Pretty please with sugar on top"

It's all part of a conspiracy

My burrito backed up on me

My super powers fail again

Time does fly doesn't it

The Psychic Hotline advised against it

It's on "back order"

My brain was sucked into the video

In the great scheme of things, is this really all that important

That runs against every believe that I've ever held dear

I'm overly susceptible to advertising

It offents my sensibilities

I don't make the rules, I just follow them

That's not my department

That's my story and I'm sticking to it!