My convergence wasn't harmonised.

My crystal was cloudy.

Somebody changed my channeler.

My chakras are dogged.

I'm not centered today.

Too much 'Dia,' not enough 'netics.'

I was in an alpha state.

I'm homeopathetic.

My aromatherapist stinks!

My third eye was bloodshot.

It was part of a pagan ritual.

My angel told me to do it.

I was having an OBE - 'Out of Brain Experience.'

I haven't had my colon cleansing this week.

I'm under a lot of accupressure.

Bad Feng Shui.