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  Not My Fault!
Why you're not to blame - New Age!
 
Bad Feng Shui
I haven't had my colon cleansing this week
I was having an OBE - Out of Body Experience
I was in an alpha state
I'm homeopathetic
I'm not centred today
I'm under a lot of accupressure
It was part of a pagan ritual
My angel told me to do it
My aromatherapist stinks!
My chakras were clogged
My convergence wasn't harmonized
My crystal was cloudy
My third eye was blood shot
Somebody changed my channeler
Too much "Dia" not enough "netics"

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