I have my own little system.

I'm breathing everybody else's germs.

This is part of a long-range plan.

It wasn't covered by out mission statement.

This cubicle makes me claustrophobic.

You're not seeing the big picture.

Someone's trying to make me look bad.

I'm a visionary.

You're not being a team player.

Didn't you get my memo.

I never got the memo.

It wasn't in my job description.

I didn't want to look like an ass kisser.

I'm a maverick.

The low morale got to me.

I'm empowered, but not that empowered.

Oh, you wanted that today?

Management.

I'm working smarter, not harder.

I'm undisciplined.

I grew up on Saturday morning cartoons.

That cigarette smoking camel.